Dear Rachel,
We have a God who still works miracles and makes His presence known to us if we have eyes to see it. So often we act like the Israelites. God works in our lives so clearly, but we either forget, attribute it to something or someone else, or assume that the thing was just a coincidence.
We need to remember the times we've seen God's hand in our lives. There is a memory etched in my mind that I want us to always remember.
Do you remember our
butterflies? We received them as tiny caterpillars in the mail. You loved them instantly and I have pictures of you kissing the container they were in. Day by day we watched them grow, and before we knew it they had spun chrysalises. We were amazed at the transformation! Mommy taught you words like metamorphosis as we continued to wait and watch. The day they emerged as butterflies was a day of celebration. They had truly become a new creation. What could be a more beautifully spiritual analogy? When we believe in Jesus, we also become a new creation. In Christ, the old has gone, the new has come! (2 Corinthians 5:17-19)
The next morning, you decided to give them names: Daisy, Waffle, Butter, Syrup, and Fighter. (Could you tell that it was breakfast time when you named them?) Mommy and Daddy chose Fighter's name because of the way he fought and struggled to get out of his chrysalis. It took the others no time at all to emerge, but a day and a half later, he was still caught and struggling. Mommy and Daddy decided to intervene and we gently tugged at his shell to let him free. It worked, but his wings remained damaged and he never recovered enough to fly. We loved him despite his "flaw" and he quickly became the favorite. He needed us more than the others did. He required extra care, and twice a day we scooped him up in a plastic spoon and put him on top of the orange slices and sugar water so he could eat. All you talked about was Fighter (actually you called him Firefighter).
The extra love we felt for Fighter reminded me of a short time in your life when Mommy and Daddy thought there could be something really wrong with you. Your muscles were so weak and your motor skills so delayed that we weren't sure if you would ever walk. You needed a lot of extra help and care because you didn't walk until you were almost 2. It sounds strange, but I think I loved you
more because of it. You needed me, and I wanted to do anything and everything possible to help you. I never really knew how I would feel if God gave me a child with special needs. Now I know. Though you are completely healed now (praise God for that) I know that if God ever blesses us with a special needs child in the future, we'll be ok. He'll carry us through it because He is more than faithful. God has a special place in His heart for the weak and humble things of this world. (1 Corinthians 1:27, James 1:27)
The day came to release your butterflies. We told you how wonderful they would feel to finally fly and "go find their families". We prayed that God would watch after them and that they would visit us one day soon. Fighter never quite made it to Release Day. Instead, he was given a special place in our garden to rest.
A week later, you and Mommy were sitting in the hammock on a beautiful afternoon. You were crying because you missed your butterflies so. We began to pray that Jesus would send us a butterfly. It was a risky thing to pray for. If one didn't come, would it bruise your fragile faith? I prayed
hard, and as I was praying, a peace came over me and I was so sure that we would see one.
When 15 uneventful minutes passed, I had to make the tough decision to go inside (it was
way past nap time). You were disappointed, and so was I. As we walked toward the house, I saw something brown on your sweater.
"Come here honey. Let Mommy shake that leaf off of you."
You came closer and to my amazement, it wasn't a leaf at all. It was a little brown butterfly clinging to you! You looked down at it and that little butterfly walked right up your sweater and onto your cheek. You started to get nervous, but after I said, "A butterfly kiss!" you were thrilled. Our little butterfly friend climbed onto your hand and stayed on you for a very long time. In fact, he never flew away. After about 15 minutes (nap time was
really late now), we finally placed him on the grass so we could go inside. I have never seen anything like it. Butterflies just don't do that. And so, Little Bear, I want you to remember that Jesus sent you that butterfly.
You have a God who literally upholds the universe by the power of His word (Hebrews 1:3). Even so, He is not too busy to care for a brokenhearted 2 year old and to give your budding faith (and mine) a pair of wings.
Love,
Mommy
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